SHAKING MY HEAD…IT’S ALL I CAN DO #RRBC

I woke up this morning to a story on GOOD MORNING AMERICA, that simply broke my heart.  Two little teenage girls were found dead on Tuesday, after having been dropped off by family on Monday (as the reports state), for a two hour hiking adventure.

You know, my daughters are young adults now, and I wouldn’t allow them to be dropped off anywhere, especially in some isolated place such as this, without adult (strong) supervision.  I mean, what is it going to take for us to wake up and realize that we live in a much different world than we did 40 years ago?  We can’t be this lax with our kids.  We can’t allow them to do these kinds of things, just because they want to. We can’t allow them such freedom, simply because we feel that they have to spread their wings and experience everything.  WE. JUST. CAN’T.

These babies were 13 and 14…who felt that they were old enough, or mature enough to handle all that they could have possibly encountered alone on this trail?  I just can’t wrap my mind around any of this!

My daughters were never dropped off at the movies…when they wanted to go, my husband and I were right there, sitting way above them in the same theater.  There were no drop-offs at the mall.  When they had to meet their friends for mall shopping trips, one of us, if not both of us, were right there, tagging far behind…but close enough to keep our eyes on them. (In my parenting guide, THE GOOD MOMMIES’ GUIDE TO RAISING (ALMOST) PERFECT DAUGHTERS, one of the tips suggests saying NO to drop-offs.)  There will be plenty of time for them to experience such things.

I cried after hearing the story above, I mean, I’m still in tears now.  My heart breaks for the parents, but I would just like to know WHY?

Parents, it’s time to wake up.  I almost said it’s time for US to wake up, but I cannot and will not place myself in that number.  You see, when these horrific acts are committed against our babies, I NEVER FORGET.  These images are forever engraved in my mind and because they are, I hold my babies tighter and tighter each time.  You people can call it what you want but because of the way that I hold mine, if they are nothing else, they are SAFE!

Here are some of the articles:

*Missing Girls Found Dead

*Daily Mail

What are some of the things you do to keep your kids safe?  Please share so that others might benefit from your experience in these areas.

 

Some Parents Ought to be Jailed! #RRBC

I like to bring awareness to lots of social “ills” as I call them, and a lack of awareness into everything your child is doing or is involved in, is one of the greatest ills affecting today’s society.

I know that we have a new wave of those very opinionated folks who have tagged moms like me as “helicopter” parents.  What I say to those “negative Nellys” is this:  my children aren’t running wild in the streets, they’re not getting into trouble “anywhere,” they’re not at risk of being “snatched” off the street, because they’re not on the street and surely, at this age, they were tucked safely away in their beds, without the possibility of being able to get up and just walk away from our home.

Take a look at this video, start to pay a little more attention and let this video move you so much, that you are a much better, and more attentive parent than you were before you saw it.  #WakeUpPeople

Nothing Like Sibling Love, #RRBC #Parenting

I opened my eyes this morning to another segment of GOOD MORNING AMERICA!  Although some mornings, the first thing I see isn’t the greatest of news, and although this one started off no differently, it quickly turned into my feel good story of the day.

Before I share too much, for those of you who haven’t yet seen this, take a look:

Although I have watched this video now around 15 times, the beginning is extremely hard to watch and I shudder each time I see the dresser tipping over.  The reason I love this story ever so much, is because of the love I see when this TODDLER saves his brother’s life.  At that age, he doesn’t even run off to get help from his parents…NO, he knows that his brother is in distress and he is not going to leave him in that position.  I CRIED WHEN I SAW THIS!  (Before I move on from the video clip, does anyone else believe that an angel moved that dresser?  Think about it…news reports said the dresser was well over 100 lbs.  What 2 yr old do you know could move that amount of weight?  I rest my case at…an angel was in the room).

Everyone who knows me, know that I am a big proponent of sibling love.  In my mind and my world (therefore in my home), there is nothing more important, and there should never be a bond as tight, as that among siblings.  In the Jules home, I call it “SISTER LOVE.”

I have raised my daughters to know that when Daddy and I are gone, all that they will have, will be each other.  Yes, they have many cousins and other relatives, but in the grand scheme of things, from our little family, it will just be the two of them.

When my daughters were small, I would pray to GOD each day, that he kept my husband and I here (or, at least one of us), until my eldest daughter was of legal age to care for the other, should we not be able to.  That way, they’d never have to go into the care of another family member, who may not have raised their kids the way we had raised ours. (And, mind you, I don’t know of one family member who has raised their kids the way mine have been raised). Why was this so important to me?  Well, not being under the influence of another’s way of parenting, they’d retain their values and morals which we had instilled in them.  Even now, I thank GOD every day for this answered prayer.

So, this is how that drill has played out (and continues to play out in our home):

*There will be no fighting, and should there be, you make up quickly;

*You wake each morning with a “Good morning kiss, and a hug”

*You go to bed each night after a “Good night kiss, and a hug”

*She should be your maid/matron of honor in your wedding, and you better be the same in hers;

*If you become a millionaire, she better become one, too;

*If you have, she should never be in need

*Never, ever put anyone before your sister.

(I’ve used the word better above, because I’ve also drilled into them that if these things don’t happen and I’m not here, I’ll be coming back to haunt them in the worst way possible!…LOL)

My daughters are almost ten years apart in age and people have always asked, more-so now because they are adults, “How did you get them to be so close?” Well, did you just read all that information I shared above?  These were, and continue to be daily mantras coming from my mouth, and going into their ears.  They probably hear me saying these words even when they’re sleeping.  Again, this is how I have raised them since the second daughter came along, and if you want your children/grandchildren to be close, you should stress the same…always.

As The Good Mommies Mommy, I always stress that #Consistency is key.

To close, I hope you will take my advice and do the following…if you haven’t spoken to your own sibling(s) today or even in the past 30 years, now would be a good time to pick up the phone.  Go on, reconnect…learn to love each other again.  It’s never too late.  Let them know, and make them feel, that should the dresser ever tip over and fall on top of them, you, even in your old age, will somehow FIND the strength, to save them.

I’d love to hear about your sibling relationships below.  Your story just might help another connect or reconnect with their own sibling(s).

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What Kind of Mom Are You Anyway? #RRBC

I have a friend who is a staunch Republican (but I don’t hold that against her and I still love her very much, anyway!). She says, “No, I’m very Conservative,” but, I won’t bore you with the details of that argument.

Every morning that I open my eyes, I call or text her just to rile her up about Trump.  But, today was a different kind of day, and I found myself angered at the thought of any mom of daughters, being able to vote for this person.  (I could call him a Lunatic or a Mad-Man, but I like to choose my labels very carefully before I go applying them.  I mean, there could be better adjectives out there that I could use, right?)  Well, I’m saving them for later.

So, I posed these questions to her today via text:

“How can ANY Mother of daughters be OK with a so-called man becoming President who degrades, demeans, and thinks and speaks so poorly of women?  How can ANY Mother of daughters feel safe with a lunatic in office, as leader of the free world, who has publicly stated that it’s OK to “grab women by the P#$%^” and “because you’re a celebrity, they’ll let you do it?”  At some point, some people need to give up their hatred of the other party and realize how freaking CRAZY this arse-hole is, and that our Daughters will suffer and not be safe under his regime.  I don’t care what race your daughter comes from, SHE WILL suffer and not be safe with him as President.  And then, how will staunch Republican Moms explain to their Daughters, that they put him in that office because they hated the Democratic party so much?”

Her response:

“Ha Ha!  I am not okay with any man or woman that degrades or dehumanizes any human being.  I believe both of our candidates are guilty of doing these things.  Donald Trump has apologized and has admitted shame for his actions. (That’s what abusive husbands do after they’ve battered their wife’s face up so badly that she’s unrecognizable, and then they turn around and do it again) Hillary Clinton has not.  I personally believe, based on factual evidence, that Hillary and Bill are corrupt and I will not vote for corruption to run our country.”  

NJ:  Sooooooo, crazy running our country is better?

She continues:  “Both parties hate Donald Trump (I assume she’s speaking of the Clintons).  If he has done anything criminal we would have found out a long time ago.  Why will I not vote Democrat?  I believe it promotes Socialism/Communism, which I consider to be immoral structures that steal from working citizens-steals their money, property, and freedom through taxation without representation.”

Whew!  She finally takes a breath!  But, all that didn’t stop me from picking up the phone and calling her.  It was time to take this debate LIVE!

“Mitzi, my dear friend (names have been changed to protect the delusional), I’d like to point out where you have totally contradicted yourself, but first, you already know that I stand firm in all that I believe in.  In your defense of Trump’s behavior towards women, you stated:  “I am not okay with any man or woman that degrades or dehumanizes any human being,” yet, you are adamant about supporting Trump, in spite of what you heard him say.  Being NOT OK with something, means that you OPPOSE it, you are AGAINST it, you REBUKE it, and there is no way that you are going to aid in furthering it’s cause.

All who know me, know that without a shadow of a doubt, I am firmly convicted in the things that I believe in, and when I oppose something, you can bet your bottom dollar that it will never wear my support.  My friend’s way of thinking, is a perfect example of STANDING FOR SOMETHING OR FALLING FOR ANYTHING.  She says she does not agree with what he has said OR his behavior of women, yet she’s going to vote for him anyway.  Does this make sense to any of you?  Because it makes absolutely zero sense to me.

Mitzi shared with me one day, that she had to vote for someone and that there were no other choices.  Hmmmm, what about that Jill Stein (Green Nominee) and that Gary Johnson (Libertarian Nominee)?  Poor things, they are unfortunately on our ballot of evildoers and crooks, aren’t they?  But, she wouldn’t vote for them, because as I mentioned earlier, she’s a staunch Republican…the ones who vote straight Republican no matter their views on anything!   I can’t say that there is much that frightens me in this world, but people who have that kind of mentality…puts me right smack dead in the middle of the original “THE HILLS HAVE EYES” movie.  And, that movie scares the heeby-jeebies out of me!

So, here is my question to all you other moms (or fathers) of daughters, who are staunch Republicans (undercover Conservatives):  are you bothered enough by the things that Trump has said about women, someone else’s daughters, that you are going to give him a pass (BECAUSE HE APOLOGIZED), and vote for him anyway?  OR, since folks have said that Hillary is evil, are you going to vote for the lesser evil?  All politics aside, at this point, my only concern is that a man who thinks the way that he does, could possibly rule in a world where my beautiful daughters reside.

If your answer to my question above is “YES,” my next question might make you a tad uncomfortable…WHAT KIND OF MOM ARE YOU ANYWAY???!!!  And if you’re curious, I had a horribly ugly frown on my face in your direction, when I asked the question.

(No, it didn’t look like this…he’s just confused at your way of thinking)

You don’t have to reveal your political party preference here, but what is your take on STANDING FOR SOMETHING OR FALLING FOR ANYTHING?  Are you truly convicted in the things that you believe in, or, are you a fence-straddler or a lean-in-whichever- direction-the-wind-is-blowing kind of person?

Whichever you are, don’t be afraid to share with us in the comments section below.  Healthy, respectful debates never hurt anyone.  Actually, they only help us grow and give us insight into the mind-set of others.

Thanks for dropping by!

So, Think I’m Paranoid Now? #RRBC #Parenting

With all of the negativity and racial unrest going on in the world lately, taking up space in every little corner of our lives, I somehow failed to catch a story about a recent attempted abduction of a child.

Now, when I hear about lax-parenting or parents who allow their kids to run off here and there and everywhere without supervision, etc., I say “People steal kids and I don’t want anyone stealing my beautiful babies so I keep a very close eye on them.” Is there laughter after folks hear me saying that “people steal kids?” Of course!  And, tons of it;  as if it is so unfathomable that children can be stolen, just like cars or other replaceable things.  Well, please take a close look at the footage below (and don’t blink, because you just might miss something) and then we’ll talk…

 

I love my daughters with a love that is truly indescribable, and admittedly, I like to keep them close, because then I know they’re safe.  I watch my daughter walk to her car when she’s getting ready to leave for work or school;  even though she parks inside of our garage, I want to know that she’s getting out of the car and walking into the house, and if I’m dropping my youngest at work, I wait for her to get completely inside the building before I pull away.

So many parents have said to me that “You can’t watch them all the time,” or “You have to let them go off and do other things away from you.” Although I agree with these at times, I am still from the thought process that too many parents, are just a little too lax in their parenting.

Too much is happening in the world today for us to not keep a very watchful eye on the ones we love the most, especially our innocent babies. In the blink of an eye, our children are gone, and this applies more to just the fact that they are getting ready to leave for college.

I am in no way saying that this mom was at fault for what happened to her child, although knowing me the way that I do, my baby, who stands 6’3 inches tall and is almost an adult, would have been standing right next to me in line, and she would have been standing on the side farthest away from the door.  I am in no way blind to the fact that there are real “crazies” in this world.   #Smart #NotParanoid.  I am just sharing the proof that’s clearly swimming around in the pudding…people really do “steal” children!

Believe me now?

To All Moms Around The World! #RRBC

My Mother’s Day Wish for Moms! 

May your day be filled with laughter

 

and void of any tears.

 

May the joy you get from your children

 

dispel your mother’s fears.

 

May the sunshine streaming outside

 

trickles thru your heart.

 

May your children be forever with you

 

and never, ever depart.

~

~ Nonnie Jules

#Hate, When Does It End? #RRBC #Parenting

Nothing breaks my heart more, than to hear a story about a child being hurt.  Whether they were hurt in a car accident, abused by an adult, mistreated verbally or even shoved on the playground…my heart feels it all, and their pain is mine…in a huge way.

It is now the year 2016, and we are still having the same discussion about Bullying that we had 10 years ago.  We are going to continue to have this discussion, simply because parents are choosing to not have the “proper” conversations with their children, in their homes.

Kids today are still not being taught empathy, compassion, patience, sensitivity and the simple difference between right and wrong.  And because of this lack of teaching, other kids are being bullied, murdered and even forced into feeling that the only way out of their pain, is to commit suicide.  How long are we going to stand by and watch the innocent suffer?  What is it going to take to get YOU to stand up and voice your displeasure in the direction of those who are offending?  Change can only come when we all take a stand…  not just one of us, not just a race of us, not just a gender of us, and not just a class of us.  It’s going to take ALL of us to make a difference.  And since that’s all of us who bleed ‘red,’ YOU are included in that number.  We must go back to being a village when it comes to raising our children, or we are destined to be tagged as a nation of monsters.

ALL LIVES REALLY DO MATTER…

*White lives

*Black lives

*Brown lives

*Grey lives

*Straight lives

*Gay lives

We matter all.

I know this is old, but I’d like you to take a peek at the BULLY CHAT.  If you’re not moved to make a change after watching this, there’s something wrong…and you should stand in front of a mirror and take a long hard look at the person staring back at you.

Better parenting = better children.  What’s your take on that?

*For more parenting and positive inspiration, please #Follow me on Twitter @AskTheGoodMommy.

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“THE GOOD MOMMIES’ GUIDE TO RAISING ALMOST PERFECT DAUGHTERS”